UK paperback

An interview without coffee

It’s bean rough

Annals of military discipline:

[T]he soldier was given “an interview without coffee” (ie a bollocking) for his trouble. ((Private Eye, no. 1258 (19 March), p6.))

Quite. Is there anything that isn’t transformed into an intimidating and unpleasant version of itself by the enforced absence of coffee?

  1. 1  Barney  March 23, 2010, 12:50 am 

    A coffee waterboarding? I mean, some people have coffee enemas at the other end, and I guess a coffee waterboarding would be particularly gruesome for a Mormon detainee (and I’m sure someone in the CIA has planned for that contingency).

    For that matter, if the alternative to the coffee is ‘nothing’, I’d rather have a coffeeless enema too …

  2. 2  Stan  March 23, 2010, 6:12 pm 

    I know someone who gives herself cold coffee enemas, but I can’t decide if this practice would be worse with or without the cold coffee.

  3. 3  Steven  March 23, 2010, 6:13 pm 

    We can probably agree at least that it would be worse if the coffee were piping hot?

  4. 4  Stan  March 23, 2010, 6:18 pm 

    Yes. What you’d have there is colonic incineration.

    A warm mild herbal tea might not be so bad. But I’m really not tempted.

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