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A stray dessert

Dreaming of a white Christmas

Among the other crucial news on which I failed to report last week was a photograph published by the New York Post showing Scunthorpe Travelodge with something white in her nostril. Travelodge’s PR, Elliot Mintz, made this fabulous statement:

I can tell you Paris does not use narcotics. I would imagine it’s something like whipped cream or a sugary substance from dessert, something that naturally might have found its way onto her face if she touched her nose. I’d label it a stray dessert.

A stray dessert. It’s so beautiful it brings tears to my eyes, as though a raggedy knickerbocker glory were to waddle up to the door of a farmhouse, looking up and mewling pitifully through the glass at the owner, who would then let it in and give it a loving home. In her nose. What stray foodstuffs are currently up your nose, readers?

2 comments
  1. 1  WIIIAI  December 18, 2006, 7:51 pm 

    Putting food up her nose? Clearly an eating disorder.

    She’s also a crappy tipper.

    Off-topic, but unspeak-related:
    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/56628

  2. 2  Graham Giblin  December 18, 2006, 10:03 pm 

    The story accompanying the pix includes this:

    Paris and Davis each had Caesar Salads followed by two $1050 dishes of Kobe Steaks with white truffles. They gulped down cokes and mineral waters.

    So it seems perfectly plausible that a small quantity of the coke avoided being gulped down and escaped upwards into her nose.



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